10 things that piss me off about the Barefoot Contessa

This is what happens when I watch too much Food Network. I get all worked up. Worked up about people like Ina Garten.

Roar! You chap my ass, Ina Garten, the Barefoot Contessa! I can think of at least 10 reasons why, just off the top of my head:

  1. She worked for the White House.
  2. You know she worked for the White House because she finds a reason to mention it in every show.
  3. She has every single kitchen appliance ever made, freely available and brand spanking new.
  4. Her laugh could not be more artificial if it were explicitly spelled out on a cue card (“Ina, laugh now, it sounds like this when a human laughs: A-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh!”) and shown to her.
  5. She writes her husband into the show, the only person on earth who is possibly more boring than she is.
  6. At the end of every episode they make it look like the only thing she can talk about is her own cooking, as she reviews the entire menu and how everything was made with her pitiable dinner guests.
  7. Her show assumes that the average person can reach into their fridge and find five or six independent varieties of lettuce available.
  8. Her website sucks.
  9. She did a whole season from France, because we can all use more guidance about how to shop in the street markets of Paris.
  10. I hate her so much.
Boo!

BOO!

(reposted from Soup For 1, my failed solo food blog)

  • Pingback: Harumi’s Japanese Cooking()

  • Frank

    FUCK U. u fail at life. get a job

    • http://www.choosy-beggars.com Mike

      I was thinking of “Professional Internet Jackass”, but it looks like someone already holds that position!

      BURRRRN!

      • Mia

        A young guy defending Barefoot Contessa??? You are quite possibly the STRANGEST human to ever exist. She truly is a worthless despicable person, and you are even worse for defending her. Please read this article for further proof of your precious Contessa being a total cuntbag.

        http://www.salon.com/entertainment/tv/feature/2011/03/29/barefoot_contessa_make_a_wish

        P.S. I’m a woman, so I’m legally allowed to call someone a cuntbag.

  • Pingback: Anniversary, Part 1 | Choosy Beggars()

  • Stan

    She is absolutely completely pretentious, but the gay sensibility in me adores that. I would just die to be a guest at one of her pretentious little outdoor dinner parties, sitting outside in her herb garden at her home in the Hamptons, with all her gay friends.

    • Candy

      Lol oh and she’s even had shows coming from her Paris apartment that she’s love to show off , look at us we are so wealthy bet you’re jealous .

  • Gina

    I just got done watching her and I’ve come to conclusion I REALLY dislike this woman. I immediately went to Google to see if anyone else felt the same way. She is extremely stuck up, fake, and corny. Not to mention boring. I hate the way how she has to throw in any of her family/friends (EX. Having her friends daughter come to pick up one of her dumb baskets for the friend, with of course the new born baby) Give me a break. Yes I understand everyone always wants to show off their little “bundle of joy” but seriously, she doesn’t have to mention it as if this baby is the best thing to happen to all of us. When she brings people in, and they have fake plots/scenes, it comes across extremely… dumb. I can’t stand how she thinks shes some “God” of cooking and we should be privileged to be watching her show and watching the people she brings on it. It needs to get canceled. ASAP. She is just a waste of space on the Food Network. When her show comes on, my mom and I use it as a bathroom/do chores break lol Who dubs themselves as an “Contessa” ? Obviously someone extremely full of themselves !!

    • http://AOL Lee

      you and your Mom are morons! Ina Garten is a great cook and easy to follow. I think you must be jealous of the success she has worked very hard for during the past thirty years. She does not pretend to be a Contessa, you idiot…Barefoot Contessa was the name of a gourmet food store that she boght in the Hamptons and turned into a world-wide recognized brand. In addition to the afore mentioned facts., you be long with Rachel Ray or Paula Deen if you want to watch no class, loud mouthed fake cooks.

      • Ina Loather

        Lee, it’s too bad you don’t have a sock in your mouth or cotton balls between your wet fingernails. She’s not a great cook (she’s a plagiarist – that means she copies from others), she didn’t work hard (it was all handed to her) and coming from the Hamptons one never works there, it’s dumped in their lap because of their schmoozing. Maybe we should come to your house for a loud mouthed, no class fake cook!

      • Emily

        In addition, she wasn’t even smart enough to come up with her own business name. “The Barefoot Contessa” was a 1954 film that she ripped the name from.

        • SD888

          Actually, The Barefoot Contessa is the name of a GOURMET STORE that was run by another woman. She BOUGHT the store and STOLE the good reputation! Ugh. Ina Garten the fat snobby Jewess preaches about Marxism and Feminism in her books, while living in a multimillion dollar mansion in the Hamptons that HER HUSBAND bought.

    • guest

      Ugh, I agree with the general opinion of this woman. There is a long list of why she’s just horrible but truth is ( my opinion), she’s so full of herself and has a huge ego that there is no space for anyone else. I;m not sure why Food Network still has this show on, but it’s just bad. Ina Garten is a shallow, ,self absorbed,conceited ,very self important character. She comes off as “Superior” to most . She’s a braggart and not to mention, a snob. She loves to stereotype people with her passive aggressive digs. Good God, just make this train wreck go away. NOw, she says :”Immm, the Barefoot Contessa”. Yea, we get it.. You paid some woman for a specialty foods store and paid for people to run it while you $$$cashed in and took all the credit and the glory. She really is full of it. She says over and over how much she hates to cook. But yet,, here she is. As long as the food network will keep paying this woman, she will continue to brighten up the food networks audience with her arrogant,snarky, looking down her nose behavior. I agree, she Horrible. She needs to go away now.

  • http://www.abirdinthekitchen.com sweetbird

    Wow – her website really does suck.

  • lorri

    Stuck-up…GOD!!!! can’t food tv find anyone better than that SNOB at the HAMPTONS!!!! all she talks about is JEFFERY, JEFFERY,JEFFERY… I don’t think she is happy “LONLEY”

    • Tonya

      I think she mentions Jeffery so much to convince the new viewers that “yes, somebody wanted me and my denim oversized tent shirts, ‘good’ ingredients, and Friday chicken dinners.”

    • Jane

      Lol and always the same black one and with polyester pants that are too short , I mean come on Ina switch it up a bit you live in the bloody Hamptons

  • JJ

    Her recipes are lame, really lame.

    News flash: I know fat middle-aged women like pie. Why is that a show?

  • Rachel

    Now she denies a dying child a wish!!!! I vote to boycott the useless chick! Paula rules!!!!

  • derm$

    I would not hit those skins.

  • cantstandher

    If anyone is familiar with the “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark” series you may remember this picture:

    http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljh03q9zx01qenrt5o1_400.gif

    I see it everytime I come upon her atrocious show and have to see that disgusting face! UGH! Please Food Network get rid of that trash show of pretentious garbage! The woman apparently was too busy for a child with cancer, who for some reason, wanted to cook with her. It’s not until the media starting bashing her, as they rightfully should have, that she claimed she “didn’t know” and accepted the childs invite. Pure scum!

    • http://batman-news.com aquarius

      Thank God the child was given his second choice, which at the end of day, I wish was a better day.

  • http://www.facebook.com/dirk.digler.528316 Dirk Digler

    A ‘Kelcie’ might be a pretentious poser, but what the heck would a ‘Kuntgum’ be?

  • Ina Loather

    And Her-hiney, you indeed sound like a woman; a woman who needs the fist. I would think, Miss Hairpie, you would have enough sense and sensibilities to ignore Miss Mia if you found her statements objectionable. Apparently you don’t come from Long Island unless there is a place in lower Arkansas that’s called the Hamtuns. Get a life, sister.

    • Penny Peehole

      Hey Ina Loather you hateful cunt, do the world a favor and get cancer.

      • Nelly

        That’s not very nice pennypoohole

  • Sara

    I Don’t know why everyone is hatting on her. Yeah her show is a little boring and its pretty much the same every episode and a little to scripted, but she can cook. Isnt that all that matters. If you want all the entertainment and other stuff then go watch another show. Shes not like 25 with little kids and stuff like on other cooking shows, so of corse its not gonna be as good and fun to watch, but idk whatever floats yalls boat. Like her or not. Just don’t hate on her.

    • Annie

      If you like her then continue to kiss her buttered up ass ( you know with the good kind of butter). She’s not relatable to the demographic, and at least the people who hate her have a valid reason.

      • http://batman-news.com aquarius

        “good butter”, love it, lol.

  • Katherine Stenz Mollberg

    her chicken always looks undercooked, even if the juices are clear to her eyes. her recipes are nothing special. It’s the elite Hamptons crowd she caters to and that couldn’t be any less interesting to me.

  • Jackie Debs

    She is the most smug, snobbish woman on TV by far. Constantly talking about her house in the Hamptons or her time working at the white house. Even her voice just oozes pretentiousness. I can see why her show is popular. She is everything that the pretentious “foodie” type aspires to be.

  • Nicole

    I love how people can’t spell “hating”. This woman is soooo irritating. She’s so smug and elitist, yet she pronounces most French words incorrectly. How is she still on?? Oh yeah, hipsters and housewives.

    • Sarah

      INA – please don’t say: fill-ay…..or-eee-gano….baysil…..peck-aaaaan…..errrrrrrbs…for goodness sake!!!! Pleeeeaaaase pronounce properly….infuriating

  • jdrichmond

    You forgot to mention EVERY shirt she wears she turns up the collar…as if we can’t see that she has no neck.

    • Jackie

      Lol well there’s no hiding her big old ‘A’ that’s the size of a city bus .

      • Alison Perrier

        Yikes. Body Shane much? She’s not claiming her value as a model. Geez. You’d think women wouldn’t be the instigators of this sad shaming

  • Giselle Scull – Monroe

    No, Not Ina!
    Gee-Ah-Da! Ugh, talk about pretentious (Italian pronunciation puh-leeze!) and artificial. She also looks like she NEVER eats, and throws up after every bite. She never mentions her friend’s names, they’re all ‘the girls’, as if they weren’t grown with children, and they also never actually get to digest their food. Her head is so big, she looks like a bobble head doll.
    Now, I feel like throwing up.

    • SD888

      Agree, Giada is annoying. She also is coasting on the name of her rich, famous movie director grandfather. And she looks like a lollipop!

  • Joan Joanne

    The thing I CANNOT STAND is when she says to use “good” olive oil or vanilla or whatever ingredient. NO, I’m going to try my very best to get the cheapest, most inferior ingredients when I have a dinner party or cook a meal for my family. It’s like we’re peasants who have no concept of what high quality is.

    • Jr

      I completely agree with you. The other day she instructed her viewers to use “good” bread, not the kind that you’d buy at the “grocery store”, UGH, heaven forbid!! She is extremely condescending and a name dropper to boot!

  • Anonymous

    Bahahaa I hate her too and she turned
    Down a kid w leukemia wanting to meet her

    • http://batman-news.com aquarius

      That in itself is bad. She could be busy, but at least acknowledge.

  • DIBS

    You people all need to get lives

  • Cecil

    She’s pretentious, contrived, boring, stiff and completely unoriginal. She is a middle american blubber beast who likes shopping in Europe. That’s it. Her annoying and desperate husband is even more pathetic than she is.

  • lmac

    This all made me chuckle, people seem awful up in arms about a wealthy, frumpy house-wife with gay friends…

    • ihaveachiponmyshoulder

      same

  • Rosey Florian

    Her husband must be gay. No real man would be married to that half man idiot.

  • Zappo15

    the whole network is just like she and should go under with all their diners and food factories and that mad looking host they have whoever he is

  • barefoot bitch

    Did you see the episode on the boat with “friends” the woman working on the boat brought out the dill sauce that In a had made and said ” I have fresh dill sauce for you ” and Annoying, Arrogant Ina, not going to let anyone steal her thunder replies “oh , did you make it ?” With that annoying laugh of hers …can NOT stand her !

  • June

    Ok, this woman drives me crazy. She’s so gd insecure and that laugh…fake laughing or is it out of nervousness?? Maybe she’s anxious that her lame witted husband will come OUT on the next show. Oh well, she’d go back to EATING.

  • http://graycatgames.com Gray Cat Games

    YES!

    I finally had it with her 100% a few years ago when she tried to pass LOBSTER off as a BUDGET-FRIENDLY MEAL.

    She’s is just completely out of touch with the real world. Holy shit.

  • Kristin anne

    I like her, wish the show was on more. Having her episode in paris is a great way for those who dont have the finances or are afraid to fly to paris and perhaps to intise some of us. I love seeing that. And tge reason she says good vanilla or olive oil, sometimes for some recipes you might notbwantvto open a pricey oil of you feel you wont taste it, or some people might buy imitation or I suppose an inferior vanila shes letti g you know its a dononant flavot in the dish or big flavor so use something you like. As far as good bread, sometimes she uses store bought bread, but shes saying for that recipe its worth buying good bread. Sure a good cook can make anything taste great. The pioneer women who everybody loves (ree drummond)always says she cant always get to the store and while she does male delicous recipes with fresh ingredients from scratch, at times she uses pantry items or makes shortcuts, like using canned pie filling, but everybody loves her recipes and many of them are her moms recipes. I usually buy bakery bread but I live in the suburbs snd can getbto a bskery. If I lived out in the middle of nowhere I might stock up but tgere may be times id have to use store bought.

  • Tess

    Ahhh you people are to harsh. Yeah has her catch phrases. So what? FD want it. And she worked for the White House, your point being??? She explained why she left. She is a cool lady.

    • Tess

      *too*

  • katie

    she kisses almost everyone on the lips drives me nuts

    • Jill

      The gay friends love that especially the flower guy , he in charge of arranging the pansies for her dinner parties .

  • Ellimac

    HAHA!! OMGosh!
    I love all of you wonderful ppl that hate ina garten! I no longer feel like a jerkface for having such haaaatred for a stranger.
    I think Jeffrey is a paid actor, lol, the food is as monotone as her voice, But, this is what really erks And confuses the hell out of me… like Emily said, “The Barefoot Contessa” is a movie, with Humphrey Bogart and Eve Gardner, who played Contessa Vargas. She poses barefoot for a statue rendering of herself, hence the name. She cheats on her husband, the count, gets pregnant by the other man and then gets shot dead by her husband.
    HOW in the WORLD does that translate into THEE MOST BORING cooking show on earth!?!
    Maybe ina is just not that bright, I mean, I’ve met ppl who were on lithium and they were more interesting than ina!
    (it pleases me to disrespect her name by refusing to capitalize) hee hee hee >: ]
    Is this show still on? Really? I’m actually asking because I gave up on food network for awhile, shows like ina’s made me loose the love.
    Well, happy cooking people 🙂 ciao

    • http://batman-news.com aquarius

      I can’t stand her but i believe her show is named after a store she had bought. not that it matters, she is still soooooooooooooooooo annoying.

  • http://batman-news.com aquarius

    I don’t know about you guys, but this “good” olive oil and “good” dijon mustard. Makes us feel like all we buy are crappy products, lol. Must be that I can’t tolerate here either.

  • Billy

    All her friends are gay not that I care they just are and shes very awkward around children .

  • Kim

    Stuck up snooty old lard butt that she is ,I do however love her Hamptons house with that barn conversion into a fabulous party entertaining room with full kitchen .

  • Pete

    Swina Garten

  • Alison Perrier

    I’ve never stumbled upon such a hateful and hollow discussion board in my life. People are condemning ina garten with more hate than I see in commentary about Syrian refugees treatment and Terrorist attacks. It’s pretty simple, if you do not enjoy watching/reading Ina garten, stop. No ones is forcing you including her. What silly lives you must have that she actually has the power to upset you to the point of angry commentary? She’s the number one cookbook seller yearly in the US. Clearly she adds value and joy for some. I’m dying 😂 people why don’t you spend your time being a keyboard commentator crusader condemning issues… such as body shaming (yeah that’s on here in boat loads, but you know we all do the same for Guy Ferris perfect bod right? Let’s judge him too! Oh wait we just do that to Giada for being to pretty and Ina for not having a sample size body) or sexism (all over these comments) and um… females in male dominated fields (yeah she’s a lady in a dude dominated industry. Go into a real kitchen and look around at the staff). She built her own business and brand people. If it’s such an easy task you should try it. Clearly she didn’t come from poverty, but shut your mouth about privilege especially if you’re white and born here in the USA and commenting on this “article” on your MacBook drinking you six dollar free range latte

    • Charlie Manner

      Its not that serious, its just a cooking show. If people find entertainment from dragging her show, why not? At least they’re talking about it and its not like they’re killing anyone (which is great in this day and age).

      I found this thread because I also felt weird for why i just did not like this woman’s show, and I wanted to know if I was the only one. I find it hilarious that there is a subculture dedicated to dragging her show. It actually makes watching it more fun.

      Its just ridiculously pretentious. Today’s episode she goes “I’m preparing a meal for a charity auction…”
      I think to myself: oh great, I can finally like her!
      And she continues to say:
      “…a charity auction to save The Hamptons.”
      My eyes rolled so hard I saw the back of my skull.

      Its that kind of madness that drives people nuts. Especially when its on such a middle-class network.

  • Susan Dournayan

    So glad it’s not just me that cannot stand her! And count the number of times she uses the word “just” usually in the phrase “I’m just gonna”….