Friday Open Thread: Friday Lunches
I have to admit, this is a bit of a quickie, but it’s my favorite recipe for a good, tasty Friday lunch.
On Thursday night, wait until about twenty minutes before you have to go to bed. Then, in a sickening panic, realize that you haven’t packed yourself anything to eat the following day. Throw aside your comforter, and in the process be sure to accidentally hurl at least one of your pet animals off the bed — if you’re able to displace or terrify two or more, congratulations! You earn bonus points that you will someday involuntarily redeem for vicious, throat-closingly sulphuric feline cat-fart revenge.
Make your way to the fridge in pitch darkness, trying not to disturb anyone in the house.
All right! So, we’ve got some… ehhhmmm… I see that there’s… uhhhhhh…
…well, that’s not a problem, let’s not panic or anything. It’s okay when there isn’t a lot to work with, right? I just need to draw inspiration from my TV chef mentors and remember what good home cooking is all about: Making the best with what you’ve got. By God, James Barber built a career on that very thing, and if it’s good enough for the Urban Peasant, then why can’t it work for us? There’s lots we can do here!
See, this is a great start: Two cups of leftover cranberry sauce! We’ve already seen what Tina can do with a few cranberries and some creativity, so if she can do it, why can’t I? It’s just a matter of some inspiration and letting the ingredients speak to me. Heck, celebrity chef Michael Smith built his whole cooking show concept on that — and if I can’t do better than an over-sized long-haired hippie chef from the Maritimes, then I’ve got a different thing coming to me.
Speak to me, ingredients!
Well! Would you look at that, huh? Would you look at that. Look at that.
That sure is an open can of an Irish Sea Moss-flavored drink, Jamaican-style. I can’t even count the number of things on this label that I don’t fully comprehend:
- That someone would make a drink out of Sea Moss.
- That Irish Sea Moss would be a specific variety of sea moss-flavored drinks.
- That there would be a Jamaican style of an Irish sea moss variety of sea moss-flavored drinks.
- That… no, I was right. Trying to count is shutting my brain down.
What is this particular ingredient saying to me? Is it whispering, “I am a secret delight imported from unknown lands across either the Atlantic Ocean or the Caribbean, my label doesn’t make it entirely clear”? Or is it hissing, “My flavor is not unlike a barnacle, if you dredged it through a bucket of rotten milk first”? So many conflicting messages, so little capacity for expressing horror.
But no, I cannot give up. As Roger Mooking would say, “You gotta make the everyday into the exotic.” This is my chance to really grab hold of something unique and make it mine. So despite the quivering nightmare I can see through the tiny hole in the top of this can, it’s time to man up and make it happen.
Okay! Now we’ll just add to this a little of this… unidentifiable brown stuff, here, and–
–oh, forget it. As Julia Child would say, “Bugger this, I’m going out for lunch.”
Happy New Year, everyone, and thanks for an incredible first year for us here at Choosy Beggars. In December alone we served over 10,000 pages to more than 5,000 unique visitors, had our recipes printed over 500 times, and enjoyed hundreds of your own comments — with a minimum of Soviet porn spam! We have loads of really fun, exciting stuff planned for this year, and we can’t wait to keep you well-fed and entertained in 2009.
So while we’re at it, Happy Friday, and speak up in the comments, folks: Where’s your Friday, guilt-free, you-had-leftovers-all-week-so-you-earned-it lunch spot?